A Gift

For a couple of years in college, I was the Treasurer of the American Indian Student Association. Each year, we would raise funds for our organization by hosting a pow-wow and craft fair. For 3 days, tribes from all over the country would come to dance, share stories, and sell their works. There were usually around 70 tables and booths to visit, and I would make several rounds to talk to the traveling artisans and tribe members. 

There was an old Zuni man with a small table of jewelry and figurines. He carved semi-precious gemstones into animals, shapes, and insets for rings, bangles, necklaces, and bracelets. I browsed his selection of turquoise works in particular because my girlfriend at the time loved the color. One item in particular caught my eye: an equilateral cross about the size of a silver dollar. After 3 visits to this man's table, I decided to buy it. I wanted the cross to be the pendant of a necklace, so I asked the man if he could put a hole in it for that purpose. He said that he would be glad to if I came by the next day.

At the end of the following day, I came by to the man's table again to purchase the cross. He smiled and handed it to me in a paper bag. Before I could say anything else, he said, "Open it." The cross had been threaded into a durable, black fabric cord with a clasp. I told him that he had done too much, and that I would pay him extra for his work. He shook his head and said simply "No, take it." Pulling out my wallet, I thanked him and handed him the money that was owed for the price of the cross. The man remained seated with his hands folded in his lap and said "It does not belong to me. It is yours." I stood there with the money extended in my hand, and pleaded with him to take it out of gratitude. The man said, "You're not listening. It is yours. It is a gift. It wouldn't be a gift if you paid for it." I reluctantly pulled the money back and said that it was too generous and I would feel bad not paying for it. The man replied, "You need to let me be generous. Do not take that away from me. When people give things out of generosity, you must accept them. I am giving this as a gift for you, and I hope that you will like it. It will please me if you accept my gift."

I thanked the man again and walked away, deep in thought. Before I gave the necklace to my girlfriend, I told her this story. I hope that it had as profound of an effect on her as it has me. When I think of giving gifts and generosity, I think of this old man and the lesson that he taught me.